paris on heaven

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paris on heaven

YO, PIRATE.

Friday, January 30, 2009

/8:12 PM

I am a victorian! Im so not used to it yet. Plus, im not really happy about it, just for this simple, childish reason - im going to go for it alone. The only PL-lite i know, whos going to vj (cheryl), has a competition for two weeks. so shes going to only come to sch on the 3rd week. But this is not the only reason that im worried. I have this "sour" feeling deep inside. and i know this is a feeling of anxiousness, not because of having to walk in all alone, but whether i am able to cope. I have to admit that i doubt my own ability. But starting from now, i have to rid myself of this feeling, and tell myself that i could do it. Just like what i did before O's. I told myself to be very optimistic, and it seemingly worked, at the very least.
ok, that was so emo so i shall change the subject! Anyway, went with hm for her piano lesson ytd, and since it was at mandarin gdns, and vj was so so nearby, i went in for a walk, giving a reason that we were going to appeal. It was my sec time in it, and i took quite awhile to familarise myself with the surroundings. Vj's a nice sch and its beautiful. Aft that i sent hm to her piano lesson and walked arnd mandarin gdn.another nice place. then i took 135 home, and came to an awful realisation that vj is AN HOUR's ride away from home!! gosh! i sat till my poor ass became numb )): and coming to this part bout the distance, it took me a few nights to decide btw nyjc and vj, cos what entices me is that ny is so so so near home and practically WHOLE pl is going there. it feels so home, so cosy, just like cj, so different from vj that gives me this "sour" feeling. But in the end, i still chose vj, and i wont regret my decision, especially after reading a pl-lite's blog. She said to never afraid to take up challenges, in fact, she loves challenges, cos it makes us grow even faster to preps us for the future. And indeed, for my useless brains (on the verge of dying), vj's going to be a great great challenge.
ARGH. This makes me so emo once again. Im going to miss all my friends. my classmates schoolmates, music o class, and EVEN my cca. Although i use to hate cca so much that i sulk the whole day when i have cca ltr on, its the imperfections that made my life in PL so perfect.
Anyway, MONDAY IS THE DAY! Im going to be brave, take a few deep breaths, and walk in alone! Its going to be alright, im going to stop frowning and start smiling. I WILL make new friends. Go for it kwek jia en! *smiling*

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